I think that when God calls us to do something, the means by
which we are called are different for each person. In biblical times, people
heard the “audible” voice of God. While God has never spoken to me in that
manner, I do believe He could if He felt it was necessary. Throughout the
process of being called to adoption, the means by which He captured my
attention have been plentiful, jaw-dropping, funny, and occasionally down right
shocking. These are the things that I never want to forget about along the way.
I know there may come a time when I am overwhelmed or sit back and think “What
on earth have I gotten myself into?”, but being reminded of His hand in this
process from the beginning will be a huge source of encouragement to just keep
going!
Looking back, I can see how a lot of my life experiences
have brought me to this point. Like I said before, what began as a thought
about adopting “one day”, has brought me to where I am at today. The change in
my heart did not happen overnight. Although I KNOW that God has been working on
my heart for many years, it wasn't until the past year or so that the calling
became hard to ignore. So let’s play catch up….
August 2014 – My good friend, Lauren, lives in St. Louis,
MO. During mid-August, there was terrible rioting around the city because of
the police shooting of Michael Brown. Because I didn’t know exactly where
Lauren lived in relation to Ferguson, I checked in with her via text to make
sure they were safe. Although we don’t get a chance to talk much, Lauren is
just one of those friends that I can pick up with right where we left off. She
let me know that they were safe and we text about my brand new niece, Emma
Kate. Then out of the blue I receive a text that says “Are you still wanting to
adopt from China? I remember you talking about wanting to.” Ummm….where did that
come from? I don’t even remember ever mentioning that to her. Over the next 30
minutes, I text her back and forth through teary eyes explaining how I had
begun praying about it.
November 24, 2014 – While we were in Augusta, GA visiting with
Whitney, Kevin and Emma Kate, the news broke that there was no indictment of
the officer involved in the Ferguson, MO shooting. Rioting and protesting
ensued. Again, I decided to text Lauren to make sure they were safe. During our
chat, Lauren sent me a picture of the cutest little Chinese girl, just saying “Isn’t
she precious?” Well only God would allow that picture to be of a little girl who
I “knew”! I had followed her mom’s blog long before they decided to bring her
home, and I actually “watched” their progress to bring her home! To make things
even crazier….I had just finished up a photography class with this little girl’s
mom! Only God! (Lauren and I made plans to have coffee over Christmas when we would
both be in Birmingham)
December 29, 2014 – I met Lauren inside Starbucks at Target,
and we spent several hours catching up. Of course, our conversation turned to
China adoption. (Sorry to all the people who encountered the 2 crazies who were
crying in Starbucks!) I shared my fears about doing this alone, what this meant
for my future, my job, my finances…..and she listened, then encouraged. We
talked about adoption as a single person and how it stood up biblically, and
then she shared about a young single mom at her church that has now adopted 4
girls. We left that meeting committed to praying for clarity in timing, and the
strength to say “Yes” when it was time. I think this was the first day I thought
“Wow, is God really asking me to do this now? On my own?”
January 4, 2015 – While going through my blog roll, I realized
that Katie Davis got married. (Actually there was no blog update from her so I
looked at twitter!) If you don’t know who Katie is, you should check out her
blog and
book. Katie Davis is a young girl who moved to Africa at the age of
21. When she initially went, she was teaching English, but God quickly had
other plans for her….she has since adopted 14 girls. So what does it matter
that she got married? Well it doesn’t really, but at this point in time “my
future” was a big fear for me. If I say yes to adoption, what about marriage?
Can I do this on my own? God used this opportunity to remind me that He can
definitely call young single people to do BIG things. But that’s not it! Because
I wanted more info, I sought out some friends of hers blogs (I’m crazy like
that!)
Gwen and
Suzanne are the founders of
147 Million Orphans….I’ve also been
following their journeys for many years. As only God would have it, their brand
new book titled “
One: Impossible Starts Here” had been published only 3 days before.
Before I even read anything about it, it was in my Amazon Prime shopping cart!
January 16 – 24 – I had a last minute opportunity to take a
cruise with my grandparents before starting a new job….last minute as in I added
on to their reservation 6 days before we left. At this point, so much was going
on in my head and in my heart. I had dug into this new book….quickly realizing
that it was surely written just for me. (Quick synopsis: Saying yes to the one
thing God is placing in front of you!) Taking this cruise seemed to be the perfect
opportunity to get away, seek His plan for my life, and pray specifically about
saying “Yes” to adopting. Before I left, I talked with my mom and let her know
exactly where my head was and asked her to pray that I would have time to
think. That trip, while crazy, was exactly what I needed. I had time to finish
up “One: Impossible Starts Here” and spend lots of time talking to Jesus while
watching the sunset. It was in the middle of the Caribbean Ocean that I surrendered
to all my fears and committed to moving forward with adoption.
January 29 – I was busy getting ready to start a new project
in California, and God was busy working on me to make a very important phone
call. I started the day with a hair appointment, and shopping for last minute
travel things. I could not shake that nervous, anxious feeling and that voice
in my head reminding me “You need to call Lifeline”. In case you don’t know me,
I’m a good procrastinator….especially with big decision or tough/scary things.
Finally, I couldn’t take it a
anymore. I sat down and made the biggest phone call
of my life (or at least it felt that way in the moment!) Marcy, at Lifeline
Children’s Services, talked to me all about their China Program. At some point,
she asked something and I choked up and said “Sorry, this is the most daunting
phone call I’ve ever made”. Looking back at my notes, I know that my mind was
going a million different directions – they are pretty much a jumbled list of
words like….net worth, annual income, 12-18 months, special needs, waiting
child, apply online, social worker, home study, dossier. (Thankfully she
followed up with an email!) After that phone call, and a good little cry….there
was relief!
So, if you’ve made it to this point….I’m impressed! I hope
what you have gathered from this is that this decision has been well thought
out, prayed over and made without influence. There is so much about this
process that I don’t want to forget, so this is essentially my journal. Also,
because I have gained so much by reading other people’s adoption journeys….I want
to be that person to someone else. (And for the record, finding info on single parent
adoption is hard – so I’m going to do my best to be open and honest about the
process!)
Thank you for walking this journey with me!
.jpg)
